Getting a date changed things. It's really happening. It's not conceptual anymore. I'm meeting the surgeon next week. We've got pre-admission testing lined up.
My head is spinning and I'm grasping at ways to stay grounded. I need to be busy. I need to create. When overwhelmed by things too huge for me to handle I go to what I know. And so, this transplant has a logo. I've already ordered buttons and I think mugs and t-shirts will be happening as well.
The transplant's color scheme is red and purple (my brother would like to add yellow, as a nod to pee—I'm not completely on board with that but as it's his experience too I'm staying open).
I'm making a book of everyone's good thoughts and wishes to bring to the hospital.
I've thought a sort of altar would be nice to have in my room. I'm thinking a lava lamp, mardi gras beads, a buddha and some flowers (in appropriate colors) will do.
I'm putting together surgery and healing playlists.
Yes, I know this is all ridiculous, but it's helping me move through the unknown.
And today I got the greatest compliment and thank you one could ever imagine. My brother said he's thinking about getting a tattoo of the transplant logo to commemorate one of the most important things he's ever gone through.
Know what universe?
In the midst of craziness, life is good.